Chuck vs The Revelation
by Newbie101
Summary: My continuation of Chuck vs. Santa Claus - Sarah realizes what she's done...
1. Chapter 1

**Chuck vs the Revelation**

_Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck – if I did, we wouldn't have to wait until February for the next episode!_

_Note: This is my first fic EVER!!! But I, along with everyone else, didn't like how Chuck vs. Santa Claus ended. This is a possible continuation … please let me know what you think …_

Something was wrong, _terribly_ wrong. It didn't take a super agent, with carefully honed powers of observation to notice, at least, not in this case. Something was wrong with Chuck – he wasn't acting his normal, goofy, loveable self. Sarah frowned, trying to figure out what was going on and when his behavior had first changed.

She studied his profile. He seemed nervous, tense; he wouldn't look her in the eye. Whenever she came in close proximity to him, he would jump and make some excuse to move away from her. That in itself was a little awkward, considering it was Christmas Eve, and he had invited her to the Bartowski's home for a Twilight Zone marathon and some "heartwarming". What made it more noticeable was the fact that Ellie and Devon were snuggling up together Ellie and Devon on the couch, while Chuck was sprawled in the easy chair. She had originally perched on the arm next to him, but when he had made no effort to shift to make room for her, she finally settled at the end of the couch, affording her a chance to study him. He seemed all too aware of her scrutiny, based on how studiously he avoided looking in her direction or acknowledging her presence, all the while staring blankly at the television.

It was a few hours after the hostage situation in the Buy More had ended. Ellie had been more solicitous than usual at dinner, flitting here and there, fussing over Chuck and Devon, expressing her relief in their safety and trying to "make up" for the fact that she hadn't had a chance to make a home cooked dinner. Even Devon had grown slightly impatient with her, asking her to slow down and relax. Now his fiancée was drowsily snuggling up to him, and Sarah attributed the elder Bartowski's behavior to the aftereffects of adrenalin.

Chuck, on the other hand, was acting more nervous now than when he and his loved ones were being held at gun point. Sarah reflected wryly on the fact that until Ned revealed himself as being a Fulcrum agent, Chuck had successfully dealt with more dangerous and menacing foes than the erstwhile "fugitive". Her asset had always recovered by now, returning to the loveable, well-meaning nerd she knew and …

Sarah cleared her throat nervously, refusing to finish that train of thought, and excused herself to the kitchen to get a glass of water. It was mid-swallow when it came to her – the last time Chuck had acted this way in her presence was a little over a year ago – in this very apartment! It had been the first time she had come to dinner, to meet Ellie and Devon. She had brought a soufflé … and Chuck had thought she was a double agent sent to kill him! Could that be it??!! Did he think she was going to kill him? That he could no longer trust her?

The CIA agent felt as if she had been pistol whipped and sucked in her breath involuntarily as she considered the horrible thought. She remembered how angry she had been at Chuck at that time – it had only been a couple of days after he had found out that he was now the United States' number one intelligence asset and she had asked him to trust her. She thought she had him wrapped around her finger after their time on the beach, he watching the sunset, she watching over him. They had come to an understanding on that beach – he would serve the United States to the best of his ability, and she would protect him to the best of her ability. How hurt she had been that he didn't trust her and that this had almost been the very first assignment she had failed.

Yet the hurt she felt now was infinitely worse! After all they've been through, after the countless times she had saved his life and (she had to admit to herself) the countless times HE had saved her life - how could Chuck not trust her? How could he think she would ever harm him? Before she left him in the Buy More, hadn't she sworn to him she would never let anyone hurt him? His lack of trust was a betrayal that shook her to her very core.

Nevertheless, Sarah pushed her hurt aside as she tried to analyze the situation further. Her relationship with Chuck (after all, they DID have a real relationship, if not a normal one, as she had once assured him) had been strained of late. He had said some hurtful things to her, first when he had been reestablishing a relationship with Jill, and later when he had been willing to let HER risk her life rather than Jill's. And had he not betrayed both her and Casey when he had locked them in the Castle in order to save Jill? They had never talked about any of this; SHE should be the one doubting Chuck's intentions toward HER … yet, not once has her faith and trust in him ever wavered. If her safety were at stake, she had absolutely no doubt Chuck would do anything in his power to save her, even at risk to himself.

_OH MY GOD!!!_ Sarah frantically mentally ran through the events that transpired earlier today after she and Casey had realized Mauser was a Fulcrum agent. She had come upon Chuck in the Christmas tree lot and set him back to the Castle. He had run off while she turned her attention to the real threat. But had he? Had Chuck actually run to safety? Sarah groaned to herself – she should have known better – when had Chuck ever abandoned her when he thought she needed help? That must mean …

The glass she was holding fell through her numb hand and shattered on the kitchen floor as Sarah's mind mentally played through the rest of the scene – the fight with Mauser, his taunts, and the final outcome when she looked straight into his smirking eyes and put a bullet through his head.

"Sarah? Are you ok? What happened?" Sarah jumped as Ellie's voice startled her from the living room.

"It's ok – I just tripped and dropped a glass – I'll clean it up – don't worry about anything!" Sarah hastily replied, not wanting anyone to join her in the kitchen.

She sank down numbly on the floor and buried her head in her hands as the implications of Chuck seeing her shoot Mauser flooded her mind. _What had she done??!!!_ Innocent Chuck, hopeful Chuck, Chuck who ALWAYS believed in the best of everyone – he must have seen her shoot Mauser – what must he be thinking? She had always been the voice of reason between two extremes – Casey who offered to kill anything that moved and Chuck who wanted everyone to "live and let live". Whenever he had thought Casey was being unreasonable, he had always turned to her and she had always been able to mollify him. He had never had to see her as a hard-as-nails CIA agent. Surely he realized she had killed in the past? An agent doesn't become the best in the CIA without spilling any blood. He must have flashed on at least part of her CIA file at one point in time! Yet – Chuck was always so quick to think the best of everyone, even strangers – how could he think she didn't have a good reason for what must have appeared to him to be cold blooded murder?

Sarah unconsciously played with the charm bracelet he had given her earlier in the day as she contemplated the rest of the events that had transpired. She had stood by and watched as an NSA clean up team had arrived and took charge of Mauser's body, and then she had rushed back to the Buy More, with a myriad of questions running through her mind – was Chuck safe? What if there were more than two Fulcrum agents? What if Chuck had been captured despite all their efforts? Mauser hadn't exaggerated when he said Fulcrum would stop at nothing, not even torture, to extract any information from the Intersect. How relieved she had been to see Chuck alive and well and surrounded by his loved ones! She was so thankful that he was safe that she rushed into his arms and gave him a quick kiss.

And then it dawned on her – Chuck had asked her what had happened to the Fulcrum agent. Without hesitation she had lied to his face – but if he had seen her shoot Mauser, then he knew she had lied to him.

A sound in the doorway made her look up, straight into Chuck's hurt, accusing eyes.

"Chuck … I …"

"How _could_ you, Sarah?"

It was then that the full and final realization hit her – she had done what she had sworn not to let anyone else do – she had _HURT_ Chuck immeasurably – she had not inflicted a flesh would that would easily heal, but a deeper, more painful wound in his very beliefs. Right now, he needed protection from _HER_ …

Unable to stand the look on Chuck's face, Sarah bolted upright and rushed out of the apartment leaving a startled Ellie and Devon and sorrowful Chuck behind.

* * *

_Author's Note: Please let me know how I'm doing. TBC?_


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck – if I did, we wouldn't have to wait until February for the next episode! On the brighter side, February is right around the corner!

Note: This is my first fic EVER!!! But I, along with everyone else, didn't like how Chuck vs. Santa Claus ended. This is a possible continuation … please let me know what you think …

Thanks to everyone for their reviews and encouragement! I apologize for the long wait between updates ... but life has a way of interrupting the best laid plans - as Chuck would testify! I hope the

following was worth the wait ...

Chapter 2

Chuck felt like he was in a Twilight Zone episode, where everything he knew was now turned upside down, inside out. As a matter of fact, the more he thought about it, his whole life since he became the Intersect could be a Twilight Zone episode. There he was, an ordinary Joe Schmoe, with nothing remotely remarkable about him or his life, when all of a sudden a computer with all of the country's National Security secrets was uploaded into his head! All of a sudden, his ordinary life became quite extraordinary – he met and became (cover) boyfriend of a gorgeous CIA agent; a deadly NSA agent became his next-door neighbor; together, the three of them started fighting extremely bad dudes right and left! All of a sudden, after his 5 year dry spell dearth of any feminine interest, he suddenly found beautiful women THROWING themselves at him. And, all of a sudden, not only did honest Chuck find himself lying left and right to everyone - to his best friend, to his sister, to his fellow Nerd Herders, but he also found those extremely devious bad dudes right around the corner, in his very neighborhood! It was almost as if, ironically enough, the Nerd Herders and Ellie and Devon were the last honest people on earth! All right, so he was being _a little _over dramatic, but at one point, it had seemed that everywhere he had turned he had encountered an international terrorist, a drug trafficker, an arms dealer, or, worst of all, a Fulcrum agent. It had taken a while, but Chuck had finally resigned himself to his new double life and settled into the routine of Buy More head Nerd Herder by day and secret agent/analyst/asset by night.

But, true to Twilight Zone formula, there had to be a twist. Chuck laughed mirthlessly to himself – and what a twist it was! And all in the space of the last 12 hours …

In the last 12 hours, Chuck's ordinary and extraordinary lives had collided! Ned, an ordinary Joe Schmoe had crashed his car into the Buy More and taken everyone hostage. This ordinary Joe Schmoe, whom Chuck had tried to befriend and help, had turned, extraordinarily enough into a Fulcrum agent sent to find _him_. And Ellie and Devon, who ordinarily confronted nothing more dangerous than a psychotic patient or abusive boyfriend or Devon's Awesome parents, extraordinarily had found themselves held at gunpoint on Christmas Eve. And then there was the "little things" - Anna thought _Lester_ was a hero. _Morgan_, who ordinarily ran from any responsibility, had "manned up" and became the actual hero. And, worst of all, Sarah, his sweet, extraordinary, gorgeous, always-in-control dream girl, Sarah, turned into an ordinary cold-blooded killer??!!!

Chuck sighed and gave himself a mental shake. In the past year and a half that he's known Sarah and Casey, he's seen them commit violent acts, but usually in self defense or in defense of their country. They've been in gun battles and knock-down, drag out fights – almost too many to count! He knew they had killed before – he had even flashed on Sarah killing several men within the first few days of knowing her. And Casey – Casey had threatened to kill him, then go out for pancakes at their very first confrontation on the roof. But he had never seen them point their gun at an _unarmed_ man, a man kneeling on the ground, offering, even _begging_ to give himself up, and seen either one of them pull the trigger. But that's exactly what he _did_ see, and it's exactly what he couldn't get out of his head.

Chuck's ruminations were interrupted by the sound of shattering glass and when he glanced up, he realized Sarah had disappeared into the kitchen. He ran to the kitchen, only to find her on the floor, looking up at him. In an instant, he flashed back to just a few hours before, when Mauser was in the same exact position – kneeling on the hard ground, hands up stretched, an entreating look on his face. And all he could see in his mind's eye, was Sarah pulling the trigger. **BAM!**

"How could you, Sarah?"

Chuck was startled by his own accusation, even more so when Sarah jumped up and ran out of the apartment.

"Charles Irving Bartowski!!! Now what did you do to that poor girl?!!" Ellie scolded from the living room.

"Wh-what?" Chuck stammered.

"Chuck, what just happened? Why is Sarah so upset? Is she still troubled by what happened earlier?"

Could that be it? Could Sarah be troubled by the cold-blooded assassination of the Fulcrum agent?

Ellie appeared in the kitchen door.

"Chuck, what's going on? Didn't you and Sarah talk? Is she mad because you hesitated when Ned suggested he let her go?"

"Uh, no, no we didn't talk," Chuck replied tentatively.

"Well, why DID you hesitate? Was it because of your concern for me? Surely you realize, Chuck, that if you love someone the way I know you love Sarah, then she has to come first, before yourself, before Morgan, before family. If that's why she is upset, she might be wondering if you really _do_ love her, even though you DID just give her Mother's bracelet. You'd better go after her …"

All of a sudden Chuck knew there had to be more to the story than what he saw and his sister was indeed right – he DID need to go after Sarah, to talk to her, to hear her side of the story.

"You're right sis! I'm going right now – I'll clean up the mess when I get back! I promise!"

With that, Chuck grabbed the keys to the Herder and ran out of the apartment - only to be yanked unceremoniously into John Casey's apartment.

"All right, Bartowski, out with it," Casey snarled.

"C-Casey! Wh-what do you mean?" Chuck managed to gasp out.

"What's your problem with Walker?"

"Wh-what do you mean?" Chuck repeated.

"You've been acting like more of a moron than usual! You got a problem with her?"

Chuck blinked at Casey in surprise. He'd never thought of the NSA agent as the protective type, overly concerned with his partner (or his asset, for that matter).

"What's it to you, big gu-" Chuck barely managed to get out before he found himself slammed against the wall of Casey's apartment and that not-so handsome mug centimeters from his face.

"Walker is the best partner I've ever had! She's smart, she's capable, and she always has my back. If I have to work with someone baby sitting you, then it had better be her. We got a good thing going here, Bartowski, and if you do ANYTHING to mess that up, to break up the most successful intelligence team in the NSA and CIA combined, then it won't be **FULCRUM** you need to worry about …" Casey ground out.

"But Casey, she KILLED someone in cold blood!" Chuck whined.

"That's what we do, moron! That Fulcrum agent was hard-core. He wouldn't have hesitated to tell the world that you are the Intersect and to torture you and your family to get what he wants. Or sell you to the highest bidder! Walker had no choice – she did what she had to do to save the Intersect. And had you listened to us and left the Buy More in the first place, then none of this would have happened and I would still have all of my toes!!!"

Chuck's momentary bravado deflated at Casey's angry words. "I-I never thought of it that way,"

"Now you go and fix the mess you got yourself into, because if she asks to be reassigned and I still have to guard your pansy-ass, this will be me in a _good_ mood," Casey growled.

Chuck left his neighbor's apartment with A LOT more to think about.

Talk about twists! Never in a million years would he have expected John Casey to stick up for a CIA agent, let alone campaign for keeping their team intact! Maybe he really was a teddy bear, as Ilsa once called him …

Chuck gave himself another mental shake as he hurried over to the Herder. He had more important things to consider than Casey's softer side. Was the NSA agent right? Had Sarah really had no choice? If there were a remote possibility that the Fulcrum agent could escape and reveal him as the Intersect, then he had no illusions. If he were caught, it wouldn't be long before he would do as they asked - he had no tolerance for pain, as he often told Sarah, and would do anything they asked to keep his loved ones safe.

The United States' most important intelligence asset hesitated when he reached his car. He really should go after Sarah, but right now he didn't know what he would say to her, or even how he felt about the girl he had dreamed about for a year and a half. He had a lot more thinking to do before he talked to her.

Without conscious thought, he headed the Herder towards the beach where he had spent the night thinking when he first realized he was the Intersect.

When Charles Bartowski arrived at the beach, he was dismayed to see that, despite the hour and the fact that it was Christmas Eve, he was not alone. Someone else apparently had decided to visit his favorite place to ponder – there was a lone figure sitting at the shoreline, staring out into the ocean. Not in the mood to talk or disturb someone else's thoughts, Chuck started to turn around, when he hesitated. There was something familiar about the figure huddled on the beach. Could it be? Would she really have returned to the exact spot where she had first asked him to trust her?

With an uplifted heart, Chuck settled down on the beach, preparing to return the favor and watch over Sarah, as she had to have done for him, over a year ago. He still had a lot more thinking to do, and his conversation with his cover girlfriend will most likely be sooner than he had originally anticipated. However, he couldn't help the hope that now burned in his heart, while he contemplated the symbolism of finding her at this spot, on this day.

*******

_Author's Note: Please let me know how I am doing! I have one more chapter in mind ... and hope to finish before Chuch resumes ... TBC?_


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